I've been thinking about...

...you!
No, that's a joke...
...seriously, I've been thinking about this new post, I was trying to get a sense of all the things that are happening to me these days... I mean ALL the things! And, of course, trying to turn all that everything into a post...
Don't think I scored! I've only been able to decide in which language it would have been written.
That's all.
I should have put names, maybe surnames, and all the details out, show them to everyone, the ones who know, and the others... better to shut my mouth, that's what I said to myself...
I've been outside for the last couple of days, many of the people that were with me, well, maybe some of them had the sense of something, some kind of work that was going on, inside of me...
A friend of mine told me I was a good liar, I mean I could smile even with a big, bleeding wound somewhere over my heart... oh, damn, she was damn right...I was just smiling, I've been always smiling... giving smiles away to anyone, don't know why... but she said: "why aren't you thinking about yourself, about what you want, what you think, about what you NEED?...being a bit selfish will not throw you down to hell...".
Just say yes if YOU think you want, just say NO if you don't.
Right!
Someone said to me: "why not Amsterdam?" when I told him that maybe I could have the chance to change my life completely, my job, everything...
Why not? He said.
Why not?
I'm definitely trying to get the real meaning of what's going on.
Another friend of mine wrote to me: "I got it now, I know that everything is important but nothing is essential..." I'm trying to get into this...
Maybe this is the only truth, the path you're tracing is yours and only yours, no one's gonna make decisions about your life, no one's gonna to take the blame for something YOU've done... so what is the outcome in letting something, or someone else than myself, take the helm of it?
I should say that I don't know why I did it.
But maybe I do.
Maybe just to be innocent, and be able to say that I didn't do anything wrong...if something went wrong...
...or maybe just to be loved, maybe that's the REAL point of it...
I'm sure I need to think about this.
A bit of time to think.
Or maybe not, 'cause past is over my shoulders anyway, I have no way to change it, maybe it's better to take some time to take a look around, start thinking about myself again, just breathing and trying to see the sun behind the clouds... it can't rain forever, right?
Everything's running so fast, sometimes TOO fast.
And, in the meanwhile, I'm trying to learn how to drive a motorbike, my "baby" knows I'm doing my best, and she forgives me for everything I do wrong (not that much, actually)...

...well, night's coming up, I think it's time to rest a bit...
I said a lot, and maybe didn't say anything... the ones who know me will understand.

May God bless us all.
Tok sha,
Fiore.